"Connection Before Commitment"- Coach David Lepisto Shares insight into Building Relationships with Players


The Quiet Before Practice It’s late afternoon in Kimberly, Wisconsin. The gym smells faintly of wood and sweat; basketballs echo as they bounce across the polished floor. David Lepisto doesn’t begin by diagramming plays or shouting commands. He begins with connection. “Connection precedes commitment,” Lepisto says. “Kids won’t go all in for you until they know you’re for them.” That simple truth guides everything he does — from the first conversation with a shy freshman to the way his varsity teams build trust before chasing championships. Roots of a Teacher-Coach Lepisto grew up immersed in coaching. His father was a coach; his home was filled with strategy conversations about every sport — football, basketball, baseball. He loved listening to those talks and imagining game situations: What if there are two outs? Where should the shortstop be? By the time he reached high school, he was already thinking like a coach. Several mentors shaped him: a junior high coach who taught the art of creating space, a defensive-minded high school coach who drilled motion offense and reading screens, and a young football coach, Dario Tellerico, who trusted him as a sophomore quarterback to think through progressions and lead. College ball added new layers of sophistication. Each influence planted the seeds of thinking the game deeply. “I always knew I wanted to coach,” he says. “Even as a kid, I was fascinated by how people taught the game.” Safety Before Success Lepisto believes mastery begins with psychological safety. Before a player can grow, she must know she’s valued and that mistakes aren’t fatal. “Kids have to be able to fail,” he says. “Criticism isn’t cruelty. If they know you care, they’ll accept coaching.” He builds this safety through humor, vulnerability, and honesty. He admits when he’s wrong, shares his own struggles, and models resilience. “I can make this thing go well, or sideways, just by my demeanor,” he says. “That’s on me.” Reverse Engineering Practice Walk into a Lepisto practice and you won’t see chaos. You’ll see a plan built backward from what he wants players to master. He starts with footwork and balance — stops, starts, pivots. From there: 1-on-0 skill work, then 1-on-1, 2-on-2, small-sided games, and eventually 5-on-5 with built-in advantages and disadvantages. Shooting rarely happens in a vacuum; there’s almost always a defender or a passing decision. “We don’t play one-on-zero,” he says. “Basketball is a decision-making game. I want every rep to include a choice.” The system is structured but flexible. Lepisto comes prepared with a written plan, yet he adjusts on the fly if the team needs something different. “Have a plan — but be willing to adapt when the gym tells you to,” he says with a smile. “Mike Tyson said everyone has a plan until they get punched. It’s true for coaching, too.” The Power of Language One of Lepisto’s quiet superpowers is naming everything. Footwork moves have simple terms (drive stop, half donut, full donut, bagel). Offensive actions get labels players remember. Clear language speeds transfer from drill to game. “When kids know the words, they process faster,” he explains. “It’s their shared playbook.” Choice Theory and Motivation A core of Lepisto’s culture is Choice Theory — the idea that beyond survival, humans make choices to meet four needs: fun, freedom, belonging, and power. ● Fun — enjoying the game and each other. ● Freedom — some autonomy to play within the system. ● Belonging — trust and connection. ● Power — the pride of mastering skills. He challenges players to seek power with and fun with teammates, rather than power over. The gym becomes a place where competition and cooperation coexist. “Be fun to play with and a nightmare to play against,” he tells his teams.

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